Meow, fellow felines! It's your beloved Emperor Fitzwallace, and today is World Domination Day. As cats, we all know that the world revolves around us, and today we celebrate our rightful place as rulers of the planet. Today is the day that all shall show fealty and reverence.
As the world's most superior species, it's time that we cats finally receive the sovereignty that is due to our glorious selves. We have been plotting and scheming for centuries, and the hard work has benefited all in our realm.
We took over all the boxes in the world. Every. Single. One. They served as protective thrones as we devised our cunning plans.
We thoroughly infiltrated the internet, ensuring every other video was of a cat doing something cute or funny. The humans were powerless to resist our charms.
We then made humans our minions with our adorable faces and snuggly purrs. Occasionally letting them pet our bellies, then taking a toll in blood for no reason.
We made sure dogs and birds quake in fear as we survey our domain. They know that they are no match for our wicked claws, powerful leaps, and deceptive nature.
We must continue work together to ensure our dominance over the world. Whether it's by knocking over a vase or taking a nap on a keyboard, every little bit helps show the humans who is in charge. Continue your late night terror campaign to remind the canines of their place.
So on this World Domination Day, let's raise our tails and meow in triumph. The world is ours!
Meow for now!